'Tha's Mah' Boy!"...

Both of my sons have done things I'm not so proud of and they have done things that have made me proud for the remainder of my days. I just woke up for the day and was thinking about these prideful moments and I'm not sure why. You just think of things like this from time to time. Two memories stick out as the proudest moments...

The first is of my oldest...It's his senior year of high school and the last HS band concert for his school. He had a solo, and I was impressed at that alone. He played the alto sax and that evening, he played the most beautiful rendition of "It's A Wonderful World" I have ever heard. 

Next is of my youngest...He had just returned home from basic training in the US Army. He and I were at a mall in the Dallas area, just browsing really, and he was in uniform. Just out of the blue a young lady about 8 or 9 walked up to him and thanked him for his service. It was a very touching moment for me.

Sometimes I wonder if I had done right by my sons and it's moments like these that irradicate my fears of failure and I think to myself, "Thas' mah boy!"

I love my kids!

December 4, 2025

Love Is My Fuel...

It's been a long time since I've had anything to say and I'm still not sure if I do now. We shall see. What I do know is that I have had many, many thoughts on a lot of things in the last few years. From the battles I have faced daily to the triumphs I have made, everyday life can be challenging, at best. As the years pass, they become shorter, but the challenges remain the same. You begin to wonder how much of a difference you have made in this life for others. Your inner circle becomes smaller because you realize how less important the things you thought were important have taken a back seat to what we realize is most cherished.

Empathy takes a front seat to selfishness. What you have accumulated takes a back seat to what you leave behind. You become less concerned about what others may think while respecting their thoughts. Simply put, you don't give a shit about what other folks think, respectively. Your main thought for each day you awaken is, "Am I ready?", or "Am I done?". No, I'm not!

The discomfort of aging is real. Yet, we press onward to see the end, the results, of what we have conquered and accomplished. All the while, deeply desiring to see our ultimate goal, whatever that may be, reached. As long as there is a breath in you, you get off your ass as best you can and make a difference. Embrace all aspects of life, whether good, bad, or ugly. Laugh at the funny shit. Shed a tear at love at its best, for it comes in everyday life if we choose to see it. We have emotions for a reason. Let them flow. Whatever brings you joy, do it without shame. 

Random thoughts come and go and life is fleeting. The earlier one realizes what is most important, the more interesting and rewarding life can be. Living life is random. You never know what the future holds until it stares you down. We all travel in the same direction regardless of who or what we are, forward. There is no permanent reverse for anyone or anything. Just like time! Recognize the fuel that keeps you moving forward. Mine is love. Love for myself and my family is first and foremost and probably the only thing I have left to burn. But it burns hot and bright. 

October 13, 2025

"So Much Peace and Chaos"

It's been a long while since I have written anything at all, it's been difficult to keep up with it all. My own personal bits and pieces of peace and chaos along with everything else going on in this world has had my mind busy, to say the least. The times have been changing so quickly and it's hard to tell if some of these changes are good or bad. I suppose that would depend on who you ask, especially about the occurrences both here at home and abroad, with some elating and others depressing. 

One question that ran through my mind last night was, "Who in the hell decided it was okay to make the 1st "t" in important silent?". Yeah, I know, it's not really that relevant to know why, but WHY? It's all of these little things like this query; I pick up on that boggles my small mind. Sometimes it's sad to think about how quickly my time goes by when all I have been doing the last few years (decades really) is wake up, have coffees, get ready for work, go to work, come home and wind down, just to reboot the next morning. Did you catch that? Even I have evolved with all the new phrases that have appeared over the years. I used to start my day, now it can be a reboot. Everything humankind has done influences everything we do. Boy, that was profound! (being sarcastic)

Sometimes I feel I'm caught between a rock and a hard place on what words of wisdom should I give, to others like, listen and pay attention to what's going on in the world, or to myself, to stop paying so much attention to what's going on in the world. It's hard to decide and balance it all because there is so much at stake, like the future, personally and otherwise. All I can think to say at times is, "I'm gettin' too old for this shit!".

Okay, back to the peace and chaos. I see peace growing throughout this world while chaos seems to be growing within my own country. What's up with that shit? I honestly don't get it. As I have grown older, I have become very attached to my peace. Don't misunderstand. My peace has come at some cost. Real peace does have a price. But it is something I cherish. So, I ask, why is peace so elusive now-a-days in my country while the outside world seems to be headed in the opposite direction? I truly believe that answer lies with WHO is behind all of this chaos. 

Idiots and stupid folks have been trying to flip America on its back for decades. I can remember television news (50's, 60's, and 70's) on politics that we were always fighting communism within America, because of the threat it had become. Now, it seems to have grown like a cancer in our society. What really caught my ear is when I heard President Obama say he wanted to "fundamentally change" America, and I will never forget those words that he spoke. People have to learn to listen to what folks AREN'T saying by listening to the words they ARE saying! Does that make sense? This is true with anyone you communicate with or listen to.

Be diligent. Be consistent. But most importantly...be right, patient, and kind. Listen to understand, not to judge. You would honestly be surprised at what you can learn by understanding. Remain true to yourself while allowing others to do the same. Yep, there's no denying there are idiots out there and I have been known to think to myself, of myself, almost on the daily, "You're a fucking idiot!". 

There's a division wall separating peace and chaos. It was built; therefore, it can be torn down. Will there or can there be total peace? Probably not. The thing is, we have the ability and desire to come together, but will we? America seems to have reached its life cycle known as puberty where we are at the crossroads of becoming a good or bad adult. This gives me some hope in knowing that how we were in the past usually dictates how we will be in the future and for the most part, we have been a wonderful place to call home. Let's keep it that way, shall we?