"Suicidal"

I understand that this is a rather morbid subject to have on my mind tonight, but that’s just how my mind works. It’s a troublesome and heart wrenching subject and it’s not for everyone to read about. But what causes me to have it on my mind is a song that I have known of for over twenty years now. The title of the song is “For Annie”, performed by Petra. It’s about the suicide of a girl, but you would have to listen to the song to really get the story and context of its meaning. It’s in the contemporary gospel genre of music. I love the group and their music but this particular song really bothers me. Allow me to explain why. But first, let allow me to say that I, in no way shape or form, condone nor think that suicide is an answer to any problems one may have and that we all should look for the signs in hopes of stopping such a tragedy to happen.

The purpose of the song is to get the word out that suicide does happen and that there is something we could say or do to prevent it from happening. But, what I have a problem with is that it focuses too much on Jesus and his love for human kind and that he cares. There’s nothing wrong with that in and of itself. I am a born again Christian. But I think the song takes away the real issue and you can hear that in the lyrics. “Momma has her meetings. Daddy has his job.” In other words, the parents were so wrapped up in their own lives and left no time for “Annie”. That is what bothers me most. The chorus goes like this, “You’ve got to her Jesus loves her, Jesus really cares.” It seems to me the parents should be telling “Annie” that they love her and that they care.

It tells a story that “Annie” may have died and gone to hell because no one told her of Jesus Christ. I simply can’t accept that. I can’t help but wonder and feel that “Annie” already knew of His love and she knew that He cared and that is the reason she did what she did, to be with someone who does love her and does care, because she felt her parents didn’t.

I really have issues with those who pretend to know the hearts of others, even those closest to them, especially when religion or spirituality comes into play. The heart is something that only God knows and no one should be so arrogant to think otherwise.

I don’t pretend that I am the perfect parent. But I do thank God that both of my children do have their place at the dinner table with Jesus Christ. I don’t take credit for this. But I know in my heart that showing them and telling them that I loved them every day and every chance I had, give them the direction they needed to seek Gods only begotten Son. They are my children but that certainly does not give me the right to say what’s in their heart and what they believe to be true for themselves.

Who really knows the heart of a person who has decided to end their own life? Yes, they sometimes leave messages but they very rarely reveal the true heart of that person, not the deepest parts where only God knows. Truth be known, there will more than likely be more do-badders in heaven than do-gooders. My point is who is to really say?

I know of two family friends who have actually ended their own life. First it was the Father, a widower, and a few months later, it was his own son. There is no way on God’s green earth I am going to set here and say that these two are going to hell because of what they did. It’s not my place nor is it anyone else’s. Judging others is something that we should not do. We can never know the true heart. What goes on between God and every individual is very sacred and very private and most of us keep it that way for a reason.

Suicide is not a good thing. But assuming what’s in the heart of others is just as bad..